Perhaps only the dead can rest.
The Sabbath is dying. It has been, for a long time, but more recently I think it’s been dying faster. I think it is because we are always tuned in; we have to overachieve to achieve; we feel guilty for doing nothing.
At least I do. It is something I want to mindfully work on. For me, a day of rest would be a day of reading. No writing.
This is very hard for me. It is also hard for me to take a break without feeling guilty. If I’m at a party or seeing a movie or going on a beautiful hike, I’m always thinking: oh, I could be writing! But if I didn’t live, what would there be to write about? See, I tell myself, don’t feel guilty. I also get my best ideas in repose. I need to remember that, too.
My boyfriend told me that if I feel guilty when I’m taking a break, it’s really not a break. There is truth to this, I think.
So today I tried to relax. I had a lazy morning, with breakfast at eleven, and spent the afternoon editing a short story. I chose to forgo my usual run for the day, because I was exhausted. I’m glad I did!
As for my short stories, I have been writing a few a week (sadly I did not stick to one a day) while also editing 10 pages of my book daily. So far I have only received rejection letters for the short stories, but I’m hoping to get an acceptance one soon. I tell myself it is a good thing that I have not gotten an acceptance letter yet, because I am forced to reach farther into my creative cavity and pull out stories I never thought I would write. Perhaps you are in the same situation as I am, so it is helpful to look at it as an exciting challenge. Then it will be that much more rewarding when it happens.
I also arranged my beautiful Halloween bouquet. There is something very relaxing about arranging flowers, something hypnotic.
I hope you were able to take refuge in a day of rest today.